Armslong and the Cab Driver

There's nothing like going to work and being confronted by the local police upon sitting at your desk. It was mighty awkward, to say the least. As the man in blue was walking towards my desk, I was trying to review everything I had done over the weekend in my mind real quick. I was drawing a blank and the officer was approaching me rapidly! Who could I call to bail me out? What did  I do?? At the very least I figured I might have some money coming to me if this were simply a case of mistaken identity.

My palms grew sweaty and I suddenly had a case of bubble guts. This, to me, was a black professional's worst nightmare--being lead through a hallway in handcuffs while his white colleagues are looking on!

Officer: Are you the Men's Basketball Coach?
Me: (heart pounding) Yes, I am.
Officer: Does Stretch Armslong play for your team, sir?
Me: (sigh of relief, yet concerned) Yes, he does...
Officer: Well, he seemed to piss off a local cab driver on Saturday.
Me: Umm.. What? How'd he piss off a cab driver?
Officer: He stiffed the cabby for $30. The cab driver wants his money before noon or he's going to press charges.

I called Armslong into my office later that day to get some clarification on what happened.

Me: Why was a police officer in my office earlier talkin' about how you stiffed a cab driver for $30 on Saturday?
Armslong: Oh yeh.. So I went to this interview on Saturday and didn't have any money on me, or a ride back to the crib.
Me: Oh okay.. So knowing that you didn't have a ride you decided to jump into a cab with no money?
Armslong: Yeh, but check this.. I told the cab driver that my roommate was home and could let me borrow the money so I could pay him.
Me: You realize we were leaving for our game at 12 and you got into the cab at 1230. How did you think your roommate would be home a half hour after we had planned to leave? And plus, your roommate is as broke as you are. He doesn't have a f-in job!
Armslong: You right. You right. I just thought maybe he might be home, or somebody else. Why you mad??
Me: The cops were at my office!! That's why I'm mad, and this doesn't make any sense!! Hold up. Just you and him live together, though. Who the f*ck was supposed to be there with $30?!?
Armslong: His girl was there earlier. I figured she be there.