Breaking Point

My father was laid off in the early 1990s. At that age it was difficult for me to understand what was going on. Up until that point (I was nine years old) every adult relative who was in my life had a job and went regularly. Many years later, I realized my father was a casualty of an economic recession. The state funded hospital he worked in was shut down along with many others across Massachusetts. The early 1990s were tough on my family.

Through the rest of the decade I watched my father flip through newspapers on a daily basis looking for an opportunity to get back on his feet. He even took computer classes in an effort to get ahead of the oncoming computer craze. None of his efforts yielded anything, but he kept trying. He never complained or cried--at least not in my presence. He once told me, "if you can't run, then walk. If you can't walk, then crawl." I can't accurately say how many interviews and trainings he went to, but there were many. Nobody would hire him. Meanwhile, my mother put the family on her back and did all she could to keep us afloat. When the going got tough, nobody talked about quitting. They just kept going...

Getting through the last three years of college was extremely difficult for me. Every time I went home to visit my parents I felt more inclined to stay. My father's health wasn't improving and it was starting to take a visible toll on my mom. I felt helpess. The only way I thought I could help was to stop going to school, but my mother wasn't having that. I cried my eyes out a few times on my way back to school. Despite all the anguish I felt, I found the motivation to continue writing the seven to ten page papers that seemed to be due every week. I didn't take any time off from school. Instead, I crawled to the finish line...

Lebraun texted one morning to inform me he was about to quit school. I figured something else happened at home that finally broke his back. I was in a meeting, so I couldn't read the rest of his message. Once I got out of my meeting, I called Lebraun before he did anything drastic.

Me: What's the problem? You wanna drop out now?
Lebraun: Yeh man. I can't do this no more.
Me: Why? What happened? You were fine last week.
Lebraun: My teacher just told me if I miss one more class, he gonna give me an F.
Me: Umm. What? Why would he suddenly say that to  you?
Lebraun: I missed three outta four classes so far and I guess his policy is you fail after four missed classes.
Me: Why have you missed three classes so far?
Lebraun: That's the only time I could go to the welfare office to get them food stamps I been tellin you about.
Me: Hold up. The welfare office is only open on Mondays, Wednesdays, and Fridays at 9 a.m.? Really, man?
Lebraun: That's the only time I can go.
Me: You don't have classes on Tuesdays and Thursdays. You can't go on those days?
Lebraun: I don't think they open on Tuesdays and Thursdays.

A few hours later he texted me again. This time it was to inform me that he had just gotten into a pretty bad car accident.