I lost my innocence early. My brother handed me the apple and I took a bite. It happened quickly and unexpectedly. At the age of seven, I was too young to fully understand what was going on but the image in front of me was very real. My mom felt bad about it and tried to fix things, but she couldn't restore my lost innocence. I wasn't damaged by any means. It's just that I understood early on how grown folks got down.
I blame the system for what happened. Sadly, my parents were also complicit in this ordeal. I know they didn't wake up one day and decide to subject my brother and I to what we saw. It was inevitable given the pressure that both of them had to pay bills and take care of us. The system compelled them to work many hours to keep a roof over our heads. Years later, I even joke with my mom about that night. She still doesn't find it funny, however.
My parents often worked overtime because they wanted to give us more than just the basics. On those days, they had to pay for a babysitter. My all-time favorite sitter was this really cool guy named Frantz. After a year or so, my parents relieved him of his duties without explaining anything to my brother and I. Years later, I found out that he was a big time drug dealer. My parents then turned to the girl next door for help. She was Haitian and my folks knew her family well. That hire made sense until something unexpected occurred.
After rushing my brother and I to bed one night, we ventured back out a short while later to see why Ms. Babysitter tried to get us to bed so early. I was ready to sleep, but my brother insisted that we spy on her. We crawled slowly to the living room and watched her on all-fours from behind the wall. I didn't really get what was going on, but my brother wouldn't let me utter a sound. Although confused, I continued to look on while my brother marveled at what we were witnessing. Ms. Babysitter was giving her boyfriend a mean blowjob on the sofa.
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